He's been in an accident, should I go and visit him or just wait until the date?

by admin on July 16, 2011

I’ve been on two dates with a guy, we get along really well. He has told me he is very attracted to me and enjoys my company. We have mutual friends and our workplaces run events that we attend throughout the year. He’s shy around me but outgoing otherwise, the last time we met I spent a few hours at his place and we ended up making out (that was also our first kiss together and the whole thing was intense and went on for hours..but even though we got close I would never cross that line..in fact making out like that isn’t even something I’d normally do..but we both felt comfortable with it, so it’s fine).

He asked to meet me again and seemed really keen on meeting up because I think he’s insecure from the way he talks – he asks me if I find his friends attractive and so I guess now there is no question as to whether I like him or not. But he didn’t reply to my message and I so eventually I called him…we dont call each other or text between dates, we only contact each other about meeting up etc. or to arrange a date but I just decided I should call him to see how he was doing. At this stage I was feeling a bit annoyed thinking..he cant be bothered to reply. But actually when I spoke to him, he had been in an accident and had been in hospital overnight, turns out he didn’t break any bones but it was still bad. I asked if he was ok and of course being a guy ‘oh yeah, im ok.’ But my boss at work knows him and has been to visit him at home, apparantly he’s not as ‘fine’ as he makes out.

There is all this tip toeing and caution on my side because of bad past experiences and so Im not sure if he cautious with me or if his shyness comes across as that. It took a month for him to ask me out after we first met and there were three weeks between our 1st and 2nd date – so we’re taking it slow. But it makes me think twice before I act on my intuition…so I think twice before I send a text etc. Even calling him..I was thinking ‘I dont want to come across as pushy’..but actually when he picked up the phone he sounded pleased to hear from me, so I worry too much. Normally I would go to see him, but im not sure…maybe I should just wait until he’s better..he said he wants to see me next week for a date because he’ll be back to work etc. should I just leave it until the date?? I mean I want to give him space and he’ll have family around him etc..so he’ll be fine

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    { 8 comments… read them below or add one }

    shooting star July 16, 2011 at 2:30 pm

    If you think like that then you are so wrong i think the person he wants to has by his side the most now is you,you both even kissed and he even asked you out again after that and he even lied and told you that he was ok when he was not, i think he loves you and all you think about is date date date and date ,you should feel sympathy and have some feelings for him think about him too,i think you should go and visit him,talk to him comfort him and ofcourse you should take it slow step by step to see if you love him or not.Good luck!

    jhgjchcg July 16, 2011 at 2:30 pm


    AMM July 16, 2011 at 2:30 pm

    I think you should go see him.
    not seeing him might make him feel like you really don’t care for him very much & he might not even bother with you anymore. I know I would be hurt if someone who KNOWS I’m in the hospital didn’t come see me even if it was only two dates. I mean I wouldn’t say anything about it I would keep the disappointment to myself. I think he would feel nice if you went to see him.

    Amber Smith July 16, 2011 at 2:30 pm

    Why don’t you just send him a get well soon card and possibly a small gift? That way he can see that you care but respect that he wants to wait to see you. Good Luck!!

    Ashley Sophia July 16, 2011 at 2:30 pm

    go see him.

    Cupids Flower July 16, 2011 at 2:30 pm

    Just send him flowers, since you guys only been on two dates. With a simple note, to show that you care, but aren’t needy. You should not visit, since his family is there. And I think its too soon to meet them..

    bitts July 16, 2011 at 2:30 pm

    wait.. go to your date as he said.. its too early for a visit or meeting with his family(cause they might be there).. if you are too worried just call him after one or two days.. just to know how he is recovering etc..

    Asha Nair July 16, 2011 at 2:30 pm

    it is right . you should go with some flowers and asks about his helth.

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